Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Hardest Thing I Have Ever Done...

When my grandmother passed away I was asked to do her hair and make-up for the funeral. I really had to give this some thought. I in no way want to sound disrespectful of my grandmother, but I have always been extremely afraid of dead bodies. I knew that this was something that I was going to be very uncomfortable with and took about 4 days to decided if I could do it or not. In those 4 days I prayed and prayed that the Lord would give me the courage and strength to do this for my sweet grandma. The night before the viewing I told my parents that I had decided that I would do it, but at this point honestly I really didn't want to and wasn't sure if I could actually follow through on my commitment.

The morning of the viewing came, I got in my car and just began to sob, I cried harder then I think I have in a very long time. I cried the entire hour drive to the mortuary in Salt Lake. I was overcome with fear and with heartache over the extremely sudden, unexpected loss of my grandmother (she was so young at heart she always felt more like my friend then my grandma). As I was driving I could feel the spirit so strong, I knew everything was going to be ok, I knew that somehow I would get through it.

I got to the mortuary and they took my mom and I in to see my grandma. We started out by dressing my grandmother in her Temple clothing (inside our Temples we wear special white learn more please go to also you can scroll to the bottom of my blog to learn more about our Temples). As soon as we had her dressed in her temple clothes all the fear I originally had was gone and I could feel my grandmothers spirit right there with us. I literally KNOW she was there, it felt as if she was standing right next to me. As I was doing her hair I could hear her voice clear as day in my mind saying, "Brittany dear, I am so tickled that you would do this for your grandma." And I know it was her putting those thoughts in my mind because that is exactly how she spoke. Throughout the time of us being there I continued to hear her words of encouragement in my mind.

This was one of the most spiritual experiences I have ever had. It was an incredible experience to know that even though my grandmothers earthly body has left this earth she is still very much alive. Her spirit lives on, she is not gone, and I will see her again. I felt Heaven and Earth meet that day. What I once thought was going to be one of the scariest experiences of my life ended up being one of the greatest (and hardest) things I have ever done. It felt so good to serve my grandmother, she was always serving everyone around her and I am grateful to have had the privilege of doing this for her. Instead of being consumed with fear like I expected to be, all I could feel was love and gratitude for my darling grandmother.

I knew that loosing my grandma was going to be extremely difficult for me. I love and adore all of my grandparents. I was very sad when my moms dad passed away, but it is a little easier for those left behind when they have been ill and there passing can be a blessing. I never expected to loose this grandma so quickly, she was my youngest and healthiest grandparent. I was especially close to her and feel like I have lost one of my dearest friends. My little 3 year old keeps saying to me... "Mommy papa Ron (my dad), his mommy died, I'm so sad, are you going to cry mommy"? He is such a sweet little boy! My kids have noticed how hard this has been for me. As time goes on it has gotten a little easier, but there are still days that I just can't believe she is really gone and I can't hold back the tears!

I am grateful for the experiences that I have had with my sweet grandpa after my grandmothers passing. My grandpa has never been much of an emotional man, but I have seen sides of him in the past 2 months that I didn't know existed and I am very grateful that I have had the chance to grow closer to him.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Parental Unsolved Mysteries...

Life is NEVER boring at our house, here is what my hubby posted on Facebook tonight!

Unsolved Mysteries... remember the show? I have one...Went to clean the sink after the kids brushed their teeth and found a yellow looking rock substance.Yes it was a little piece of poo in the sink!. I Asked my 8 year old and got " i thought it was a smashed tootsie roll or something but don't know how it got there." My 3 year old is still in diapers(he had clearly had his on for a while) plus he had an alibi. My 5 year old when asked said " I don't remember!!" and was wearing one of my 3 year old's pull-ups? When asked again and again she boldly stuck with her temporary amnesia story. I guess we will never know how the mystery poo got there!?

***HAHAHAHA, this little incident had me laughing for quite awhile!

Friday, January 14, 2011

A Day I Won't Forget...

-Downtown Kansas City, Missouri where we lived for 5 years-

Today I was thinking back on a day I will never forget. Unfortunately this was not a happy day in the history of the Jones family...

February 2009, it was just a normal day, my oldest was at school and I was home with the two little ones. I heard the garage door open and thought, that's weird! Then my husband walked through the door. I can remember vividly coming part way down the stairs and seeing his face. I don't know how I knew what had happened but I guess his face just said it all, he had lost his job. This came as quite the shock since he had only been with the company about 5 months. This was far from a dream job, but none the less it was a job we were grateful to have. Previous to him getting this job he had sold Alarms for APX for 7 summers, so when this job came along we were thrilled to be moving on to a new phase of life. Not having an income and having 3 kids to care for was one of the scariest things I have been faced with. With this news we had lots of BIG, hard decisions to make. We immediately put our home up for sale. Luckily we were able to get an offer on our home quickly, but at quite a loss to us. We decided that we would go sell Alarms for another summer and then move back to Utah to be near family and look for a new job.

It has almost been 2 years since this trail hit our family. We have been faced with several VERY difficult trials in our marriage but we always seem to make it through them stronger and better because of them. I know that the Lord sends us trails so that we have the opportunity to grow and learn. I truly am grateful for my trials because I really believe that they make up who I am. I think that the good in life is so much more meaningful when you have had a taste of some of the not so good things too. I still miss Kansas City, our friends, ward (church), and at times our home. Although I feel like I have learned so much in the last two years and now have a better understanding of how the Lord works. His plan is not always the same as our plan (in our case his plan in usually much different) but I have really developed more Faith in knowing that no matter what I can follow his plan for me and I WILL be happy!

I NEVER in a million years imagined that I would live in Kansas City, Missouri of all places. I know that the Lord lead us there because of the experiences we would have and the friends we would meet. It was there that I gave birth to 2 of our 3 children, and it will always be a special place to me. The years we spent there my testimony of the Gospel grew immensely through the wonderful missionary opportunities. It was through living there as well that my testimony of the importance of Temple attendance really developed. I can't believe I am saying it now, but I miss those 3 hour car rides one way to attend the temple. Going to the temple took on a new more significant meaning to me when I had to go to so much effort to get there.

After all of our wonderful experiences living in Kansas City I also never in a million years imagined that we would ever end up back in Utah. But like I said the Lords plan and what I think should happen don't always seem to coincide (and I'm ok with that). After coming back to Utah my husband was able to find a great job in just a few days, I know that this was an amazing blessing from the Lord and showed me just how much he loves us and is mindful of us. The Lord has placed some amazing people in our lives to help us through our difficult times and I am always in awe of how things just always seem to work out even when it doesn't feel like they will!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Bad blogger!

We had family pictures taken with Courts fam over Christmas, if you are looking for a photographer my friend Jodi is VERY talented

It has definitely been AWHILE! Life for our little family has been extremely chaotic lately and I just can't seem to find time to blog (among many other things I don't have time for right now). I have a cute friend that blogs just about everyday, sometimes it is just a line or two or something funny one of her kids said. Her blog has really got me thinking about my own life and how I am not "Stopping to smell the roses". I don't want to forget the "little things" that make up my families life and I don't want to forget the funny things my kids say and do. So my new years resolution is to blog at least twice each week, even if it is just a few sentences about what happened that day. I know that I will cherish these memories forever.(My other goal is to catch up on my blog books, I have only finished one year so far and had it printed BUT I love it)

On Sunday I was sitting in Relief Society (which I have not been to in FOREVER since I have been in Primary for years). The lesson was about keeping the Sabbath Day Holy, the teacher had given us a piece of paper that we could jot down any thoughts or impressions we had during the lesson. We were discussing how hard it is to come to church with young children and how many times you are in the hall with them, etc... Some of the young(er) moms were mentioning how with a baby or toddler there are times that you begin to wonder, "why am I doing this". Since it has been quite awhile since we have had a baby, church has definitely gotten easier in the since that all of our kids are in Primary now (J. my 3 year old just started Sunbeams). But there are still so many Sundays that my kids are being naughty and I think to myself that it is too hard. As I was listening to the other comments in the class I was completely cover come with the spirit and I had suddenly remembered an event that had happened earlier in the week...

I was in the car going somewhere with the kids and from the seat behind me I could hear my little man singing a primary song. At first I couldn't quite figure out what he was singing but as I payed closer attention I realized he was singing "I Know That My Savior Loves Me". My girls LOVE this song and sing it all the time so I have no doubt that he's learned it from them. As he was singing in his darling little voice the only 2 lines he could really remember were, "I know he lives" and "I know my Savior loves me". Thinking back on this moment was a great testimony builder to me of how important it is to teach our children the gospel and to teach them about the Savior. I am so grateful to my parents for taking me to church each week, even when I am sure at times with 5 young kids it wasn't easy, but it was definitely worth it! I know that if I will have the faith to teach my children and take them to church each week even when it seems really hard to do so that our family will be blessed!