Monday, April 30, 2012
On June 19th, 2011 my handsome, sweet, funny, charismatic, loving brother at just 20 years old took his own life. I don't have the words to adiquitely describe what pain and devistation his death and how he died has impacted our family. We will NEVER be the same, we have felt devistated, heart broken, confused, sad, angry, and helpless. Through this trial and tragedy we have seen the Lords hand through the countless friends and family who have carried us through these past ten months. We have held tight to our FAITH because it is the only way we will get through this and it is only through the Savior Jesus Christ that we can heal. With the heartache there has been an overwhelming sense of peace, we know where Jake is, we know he has returned home to the loving arms of our Father in Heaven and Savior Jesus Christ, and we KNOW we will see him again.
I never in a million years would have thought my brother would take his life. There are still many days that I think to myself, "I can't BELIEVE this happened, I can't BELIEVE he is REALLY gone." In the past ten months I have learned a lot about myself, my family, my spirituality, and a lot about my brother. Having experienced loosing someone so close to me, so important to me, I have gained a different perspective on life and my priorities have changed. Loosing my brother in this way has changed me. In some ways I will admit I am jaded, I am angry, hurt, and absolutly terrified of ever loosing someone close to me again. But with the bad there has come good. I have learned that life is fragile and we need to not take anything for granted. We need to build strong family bonds and express to the one's we love what they mean to us. We need to keep our priorities in check and we need to seek after righteous desires.
the website will be up and running soon as well... www.mud-run-4-life.org
or visit our facebook event page... mud-run-4-life
Monday, April 23, 2012
It has been beautiful here in Utah the last few days! I dont know what it is about the warmth, but it sure does seem to liven my spirits. I love soaking up a little sunshine and enjoying the outdoors!
Life has been pretty busy lately and I am having a hard time remembering to slow down and enjoy it. I am looking forward to long summer days playing with my kiddos and taking a break from the hussle and bussle of life.
I have gotten way behind again with my blogging, so much for that New Years Resolution ;).
For my own family history... the last few months have been busy and stressful. Courts job has sometimes been a little rocky and it has gotten us thinking about long term goals and really thinking about where we want to be in many areas of our life. Financially speaking this bad economy sure makes it hard to raise 4 kids at times. But as usual, as trials arise in our marriage I am continually reminded that if we keep our covenants with the Lord he will bless us and provide away. I am reminded that money is JUST money, do we need it to live, yes, but does it make up who were are or bring true happiness, absolutly not. I am so grateful my husband has a job, that I have the privilege of being a stay-at-home mother, we have a roof over our head, food to eat, clothes to wear, cars to drive, and MOST importantly we have each other and the gospel. If you think of "riches" in terms of blessings, I am one of the richest people I know. I have wonderful friends and family, a loving husband, 4 darling kids, and the Gospel of Jesus Christ as the center and focus of my life... I am RICH in blessings!